An Open Letter To The Friends Of Israel

There are many wonderful and enlightened friends of Israel who know exactly what Israel should do to secure everlasting peace with the Arabs. First thing is to remove its military presence in the West Bank. Next thing is to open the borders with Gaza.

Israel’s friends know precisely that this will lead to the same peace Luxemburg has with Belgium or France, which is a boring peace—those are the best.

Israel’s friends are completely convinced that the problems Israel has with the Palestinian leaders in Gaza and in Ramallah originate in Israel’s stubbornness regarding the Gaza blockade and its insane safety demands on the West Bank. Israel’s friends claim: open the border, withdraw, and eternal peace can be welcomed.

Israel’s dear friends cannot imagine that the Hamas leaders don’t care for peace; it may be so that the Hamas guys are only happy when they wage wars—that they abhor peace. Peace would be a capitulation, the acceptance of the loss of Haifa and Jaffo, and this humiliation is worse than eternal warfare, at least, in the eyes of the Hamas gentlemen.

But who says that true friends of Israel like Martin Schulz and John Kerry are totally wrong? In theory they could be right. Never exclude a theoretical truth.

So we have to ask questions. The first question is: can Israel’s friends take responsibility for the actions they want Israel to take? The next question is: what happens if they are wrong?

It may be time to come up with a proposal Israel’s dear friends in the powerful corridors of the EU and Washington DC should make. It is a serious thing they should consider. They should offer it to Israel together with their peace proposals.

As Israel’s friends know, there are many European Muslim men fighting in Syria. They know how to pack a bomb in a backpack, decapitate the enemy, fire a homemade rocket, rape women. In other words: creative, courageous young men, these fighters. But it will be difficult to re-integrate them the moment they return to their wonderful homes in Hamburg or Rotterdam or Lyon or Leicester. They are fighters. And they need a job.

In order for Israel’s friends to convince Israel that Israel is wrong about the sweet men running the shows Gaza and the West Bank, that these men just want get their Amazon orders as fast as the Israeli’s, Israel’s friends should hire the returning and very experienced Syria fighters.

And they should propose the following: ‘Dear Israel, we are totally convinced that you are the problem. Make an end to the Gaza blockade, withdraw from the Jordan Valley and remove your ridiculous roadblocks. You will notice: the Palestinians are going to love you. We understand you are concerned about your safety, dear Israel. But we believe you are over-concerned. You are obsessed with safety and you cannot see anymore how lovely the Palestinian leaders are. They like Beyoncé as well. The watch Breaking Bad as well. But you are wrong, Israel, and we are right. So we promise: in case the Palestinians shoot rockets to your towns, we will deliver the same rockets to our Syria veterans, and they are free to shoot these rockets to Brussels and Washington DC. Same distance, same weapons. Because: why would we ask from you what we don’t believe in ourselves?’

‘So: do what we say. No blockade. No roadblocks. And if there are shootings and rockets, we will punish our own population. We are so convinced that we are right and you are wrong, that we can say: one to ten, okay? If one of your people dies, we will ask our refined Syria veterans to shoot and fire rockets until we have ten deaths ourselves.’

It would be wonderful if John Kerry, at his next visit to Jerusalem, would propose such an arrangement. It promises interesting employment for the Syria veterans, and it creates real believability. John Kerry should say: ‘There will be peace, and if not, I will give some Jihadi’s a green card so they can do to us what I forced you to do to yourself.’ Oh, boy, in that case we easily can put our trust in him. I am looking forward to John’s next speech. It is called: ‘I would never ask you to do something I would never do myself’. It could also be the title of a Broadway Song.

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